Earning your stripes

So, we decided to go for a picnic with some friends on Sunday afternoon. As you would expect with any situation where there is an ample supply of wine, gin and vodka, conversation got pretty interesting. 

We went from chatting about crackers and dip to a status I saw posted on FB the other day. (for security purposes we have with-held the name of this bright spark)

It read: “ladies, don't be ashamed of your stretch marks, embrace them cause they mean that you're a tigress and you've earned your stripes”... which got me thinking. WTF?!

Personally, I do not think stretch marks are attractive. I mean, when last did you see a chick walking in the mall flashing her stripes? I say go to Makro and buy Bio-oil in bulk, cover that shit up!

Let us look at the word ti-gress closely:

Thesaurus - large feline of forests in most of Asia having a tawny coat with black stripes; endangered

Noun: A woman regarded as daring or fierce...

Unless you're blind, deaf, have a hunch back & one leg with a PHD, then you've earned your stripes. Now, if you've been stuffing your face all your life and wonder why you have stretch marks behind your knees and still wanna refer to yourself as a tigress then sorry sister, you are no tigress!

Rather than referring to people's nasty wobbly bits, why not empower women by referring to their actual achievements.

My definition of a tigress, my mother, who has single-handily raised me for the first half of my life while holding down 3 jobs and risked going to jail when I was 2 just to put food on the table.

Moral of today's story... Stretch marks have nothing to do with your achievements, the way I see it, they are mother nature's way of hi-fiving you for a job well done or a warning that if your ass doesn't stop eating you will eventually leave strecth marks on your clothes! Nuff said.